The Writer
by Tamzin W
Summary: B'Elanna discovers some femslash fanfiction written 400 years ago and demands to know what is going on..
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to Star Trek Voyager, those are the property of Paramount I am simply borrowing them. This story depicts a relationship between two women. If you don't like, it's illegal or your under age, read another story. This is a silly idea I had one day (probably the result of sleep deprivation)

Storming into Captain Janeway's ready room B'Elanna threw a padd on the desk in front of the petite auburn haired woman "Have you seen this!" she demanded

"B'Elanna you can't just waltz into my ready room throwing padds around!" Janeway started absent mindedly picking up said padd and glancing at it

"B'Elanna Torres, Chief engineer of the Starship Voyager threw Seven of Nine, former Borg drone, onto her desk. "I will have you now Borg" the fiery engineer growled as she proceeded to give the blond the biggest hickey in Voyager's history"

"What the hell is this?" Janeway demanded to know

"It's called fan-fiction! And it's not just me and Seven.. You and Seven, Me and You, Harry and Tom, Me and Tom, You and Chakotay, Seven and Chakotay, Seven and the Doc! We're all at it!"

"Seven gets around doesn't she? Who's writing these then? Is it a member of the crew?" Janeway asked frowning

"This is where it gets strange Captain. I found them while I was going through historical records from Earth. They were written in the 21st century" B'Elanna explained

"21st century Earth? But how?" Janeway frowned in confusion just as Seven of Nine stormed in

"Captain I demand to know what you propose to do with regard to this fan fiction writer" she stated taking up her usual pose, back ramrod strait, hands clasped behind her back

"Well as B'Elanna was just explaining to me it seems they originate from the 21st century.. I'm not sure there is anything we can do about it" Janeway looked at her two senior officers bubbling with fury in front of her. She had to admit they would make a good couple.

"The time the writing originates from is irrelevant" Seven stated causing the other two women to stare at her in disbelief

"What are you on about you demented Borg bitch!" B'Elanna spat at her. "How can we deal with some idiot who was writing about us 400 years ago! And more importantly how the hell did they know about us if we are from their future!" the fiery engineer dissolved into mumbling about thick drones knowing nothing as Janeway glared at her

"Insults are illogical and unproductive Lieutenant. I believe if we reconfigure the deflector dish to emit a chronoton pulse we can travel back in time and apprehend the individual responsible for the.. literature" the last word was said with a hint of disgust

"And what is so distasteful about someone putting you in a situation with me then Ice Queen?" B'Elanna growled

"You are also not happy Lieutenant otherwise you would not be here" Seven stated without answering B'Elanna's question. In truth she wouldn't object to being intimate with the half Klingon. If only the woman could get past her irrational dislike of her.

"I'm not happy about being put with that blockhead Tom Paris! As if I'd marry... that.." B'Elanna spat out in disgust "And don't these idiots know the Captain is like a mother to me!"

"So you do not object to the stories concerning you and I?" Seven asked

"That... Is irrelevant. We aren't together are we, in fact I don't think we've ever had a civil conversation" B'Elanna shot back thinking about how much she'd actually like those stories to be true.

Captain Janeway watched the two women idly for a moment "Stop arguing for a moment will you.. God your like a married couple" Janeway smirked at the look of outrage on both women's faces [hmm touch a nerve did I?] she thought "Seven you were saying something about the deflector dish"

"Indeed Captain" Seven confirmed glancing at B'Elanna "I believe that if we emit a high frequency chronoton bursts from the deflector dish we can travel back to... 20102 Seven glanced at the publishing date on the padd in front of Janeway before continuing "Where we can apprehend the individual responsible and ask that this... Writer.. explain themselves"

"Oh come on Seven you know if we go swanning off into the past again Braxton will wipe us out of history altogether" B'Elanna argued. It wasn't that Seven's plan wouldn't work she just hated letting that smug, superior, arrogant, beautiful, sexy... [Wait.. What was I thinking about?] B'Elanna mentally chided herself for yet again allowing her mind to wander off in THAT direction.

"Perhaps a two person crew in the Delta Flyer then?" Seven countered. Why did B'Elanna always have to shoot her ideas down. She hated the way the irrational, chaotic, aggressive, fiery, beautiful, sexy.. [My logic has taken a nosedive again] Seven mentally chided herself for allowing her thoughts to wander off in the direction many of the stories she'd read went.

"Okay.. As this is much to personal I will send Tuvok and Chakotay in the Delta Flyer to apprehend this.. Writer.. And we can see what's what. Is there anything else you two wanted?"

"No Captain.. Well except.. Keep HER out of my engineering department..." B'Elanna growled glaring at the former drone who simply raised that damn ocular implant at her in response.

What Captain Janeway heard was.. 'she's messing with my toys Momma!' and responded with "If you can't learn to share engineering I suggest you resign" causing Seven to smirk at B'Elanna which in turn caused the petite engineer to growl in frustration and storm out of the ready room.

Turning to the Captain Seven merely raised an implant before exiting in B'Elanna's wake.

"Your both dismissed.. That's fine... Don't wait for me to say anything.. I'm only the Captain" Janeway grumbled to the now empty room before curiosity got the better of her and she picked up the padd that B'Elanna had abandoned on her desk.


	2. Chapter 2

"Tuvok to Voyager" Tuvok's voice came over the comm. It had been 17 hours since the flyer had left to apprehend 'the writer' as the crew had taken to referring to the person responsible for the stories.

"Voyager here" Janeway responded

"We have apprehended the young lady responsible for the stories. Permission to dock" Tuvok's disembodied voice drolled on.

"Permission granted. Meet us in the conference room. Janeway out" The Captain looked around the bridge "Come on lets get this over with" she said to no one in particular as she walked to the turbolift.

The senior staff were all sat nervously around the table when Tuvok and Chakotay entered with the young woman in tow. Indicating that she should sit at the table next to the Captain, Tuvok and Chakotay sat next to each other.

"Okay. Your here to explain to us how it is that you are writing stories based on us when you are 400 years in our past" Captain Janeway glared at the woman

"Well they're based on a television show. I didn't come up with the characters. And I didn't write all the stories.. I er.. kinda specialize" the woman explained glancing at Seven and B'Elanna

"A television show? But how would they know about us?" Tom asked causing B'Elanna to sneer at him

"Well lets see.. Voyager is the last in terms of time-line as presented through the show.. Did James Kirk exist?" the writer asked

"Indeed James T Kirk was the Captain of the flagship Enterprise" Seven confirmed

"Hmm.. And what about Jean Luc Picard?" the writer asked

"That Earl Grey drinking monkey man!.. Yeah he's an admiral in Starfleet" B'Elanna confirmed the existence of said man

"He's not the Captain of the Enterprise in this time-frame?" the young woman looked confused momentarily

"No. He commanded the Excelsior when he was a Captain" Janeway corrected "Captain Laforge is commanding officer aboard the Enterprise - G"

"G? The show never got that far through the alphabet. Well anyway. The show is obviously based on real events.. Perhaps you need to look to the writers at Paramount for the answer. Perhaps Gene Roddenberry himself"

"Admiral Roddenberry?" Janeway sat upright "Oh hells... Okay we need to get you back. I know what happened now. That damn 25 century Admiral got himself stuck in the past and wrote about us"

"Hang on I wanna know why me and Seven are together in a lot of those stories" B'Elanna shot out as the writer stood to leave with Tuvok and Chakotay

"Uh.. in the show your not.. your married to that prat" she said pointing at Tom who opened his mouth in protest. "Just out of interest.. Who is actually with who?"

"Tuvok and Chakotay have been married for 3 years" Janeway explained "Harry is with Megan Delany, Neelix and the Doctor have a little tete a tete going with Megan's sister Jennifer, Tom is the ship's bike, I am married to a beautiful woman and I don't plan on breaking my marriage vows anytime soon. And B'Elanna and Seven here are both single"

"You did not answer the Lieutenant's question" Seven said dangerously "Why do you insist on placing us in those scenarios?"

"Well duuuh!" the writer shot back at Seven causing B'Elanna to laugh "Because it's bloody obvious from 400 years ago that you two fancy the pants of each other so why don't you stop being so damn stubborn and get it on already. Honestly.. Characters! Never do what you tell them!" the young woman stormed off out of the room followed by Tuvok and Chakotay. B'Elanna and Seven simply looked at each other mouths hanging.

"Can you believe the nerve of her?" B'Elanna asked Seven

"She does defy all known laws of belief" Seven replied

"I think she has a point" Tom said flinching as two pairs of eyes narrowed at him "Well she does!" he protested as reluctantly the rest of the room nodded and then made hasty escapes.

"You don't think that do you Captain?" B'Elanna demanded

flinching slightly under the glare of the two women Janeway replied carefully "Well..."

"I don't believe this!" B'Elanna threw her hands in the air

"Do you really find me so unappealing Lieutenant?" Seven asked quietly frowning at B'Elanna as Captain Janeway crept out of the room

"Well.. no.. It's just that...you know" B'Elanna stuttered

"I do not know. Why do you persist in reacting as if i were.. Tom Paris?" Seven demanded

"What? Seven.. Kahless!" the half Klingon growled

"Exclaiming Kahless' name is not explaining why you find me unattractive" Seven blurted out, she didn't mean to but something inside her had to wind up the fiery engineer who was glaring at her.

"Why are you so god damn annoying!" B'Elanna screamed in Seven's impassive face. It was only because she was nose to nose with the former drone that she noticed the tall blond wasn't as impassive as she seemed.

"you didn't answer my question" Seven growled back between gritted teeth.

Suddenly B'Elanna brought up her hands and grabbed the blond's face pulling her into a passionate kiss. Panting she said "Does that answer your damn question!"

"Indeed" replied Seven as she pushed B'Elanna onto the table and proceeded to vent the years of frustration on the hapless piece of furniture.

Meanwhile outside the door Captain Janeway handed over officers pips to the young woman whom everyone referred to as 'the writer' "Well done Lieutenant Commander Wildman our ruse worked perfectly"

"i believe my work here is done... How about a drink?" The woman smiled

"Lets get you changed back to your usual self first... I prefer you blonde" Janeway said kissing the newly promoted Lieutenant Commander

"Should we let them know it was all faked?" Sam asked her wife

"Hmmm maybe not for a while" Janeway said as they exited the bridge, sniggering as the officers around the operational centre of Voyager tried their best not to hear Seven and B'Elanna in the meeting room. "Let them work their issues out first"


End file.
